For most of us, the story of independence is the story of giving up codependence. In order to change, I had to accept that other people aren’t fundamentally responsible for my emotional state. I’m responsible for my emotional state. I think I’ve realized this most acutely through writing, which is so individual and painful—no one can really help me with it. It has to be self-generated. Other people can help you edit, give you feedback, and read over your drafts, but it has to come from you. That’s how everything works, right? No one can help you self-actualize except you.
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