Timing and context matter

Recognize that different people and situations require different approaches. Consider the timing and context when offering advice or making decisions.

The walk

There is one tool that has been used with near-perfect consistency by history's greatest men and women. From artists and inventors to entrepreneurs and athletes, they have all understood the immense power of this one, simple tool: the walk.

The worst that can happen

We tend to assume that the worst that has happened is the worst that can happen, and then prepare for that. We forget that “the worst” smashed a previous understanding of what was the worst.

You need to build brakes that allow you to accelerate

Having a strong set of brakes allows the driver to hit the turns at high speeds and accelerate through tight windows with confidence, knowing that they have something reliable to fall back on if needed. This is a metaphor for life: You need to build brakes that allow you to accelerate and hit turns without fear.

Action is always the way

More is lost by indecision than wrong decisions. Indecision is the thief of opportunity. It will steal you blind. Regret is more painful than failure. Action is always the way.

Can it be okay to have some tension sometimes

We’re all scared kids trying to figure it out. And so, so many of us get caught in, let’s be appropriate. Let’s do it right. Let’s not offend anybody. And what I see is, the neater we try to get, the less growth we actually get to experience most of the time. We can certainly create environments that are too edgy where people are so anxious that they can’t learn and grow. And that’s not the kind of mess I’m talking about. But I’m talking about, can it be okay to have some tension sometimes?

By breaking things down into actionable steps

Certain tasks, especially big ones, can seem completely daunting. However, if you break something down, it becomes so much easier. Don’t love decluttering? Do it one area/folder at a time. I find that tasks often seem monumental until you have a system to understand them, focus on them, and tackle them. By breaking things down into actionable steps, you are making them less daunting and easier to chip away at until they’re done.

Sometimes you just have so much on your plate

When you can’t keep up with everything that’s demanding your time, a hard reset may be just what you need. Sometimes you just have so much on your plate that there’s no getting ahead of it. When this happens, you can save time and effort by wiping the slate clean and starting over. This will give you a chance to get back on top of things while eliminating unnecessary tasks in the process.

A fast “no” is better than a slow “yes”

You know there are things you're putting off saying no to. The problem is, the longer you wait to say no, the more obligated you feel to say yes. Whenever you hold on to something, you are letting it take up space in your mind unnecessarily. What if you gave a fast no instead of a slow yes? By firmly putting your foot down and saying no, you are ending that occupation of your space and time.

Say “no” twice as much as you do now

Everything you say yes to costs time. The “future you” don't have more time than the current you—yet we’re much more willing to burden our future selves with a half-hearted yes than to face the discomfort of saying no in the present.

Life is about experiencing it all in its fullness

Life is about experiencing it all in its fullness. It isn't about cherry-picking the bits we want while pretending other things don't exist. That isn't how this works. Believing we can choose is the very thing causing the bulk of our anxiety. We move into a more illusory experience of reality every day. Spending our lives on social media presents a false sense of what reality is truly about. Look around you right now. The world isn't all joy. There is pain. And when we are open to seeing it, feeling it, and accepting it. The resistance is gone. The wishing and hoping are gone. The straining and stressing are gone. Our anxiety is gone.

Give the gift of time

People have various skills or woes, advantages or disadvantages in life, but we all have the same amount of time. We all have 24 hours in a day, and 168 hours in a week. So when you find people who are doing absolutely amazing things — professionally and personally — it is entirely possible that these people are smarter, richer, or better looking than the rest of us. But they do not have more time.

If it’s all in bold

 Be brave but remember this- If it’s all in bold, then none of it is in bold.

Accept pauses and silences

To be a good listener is to accept pauses and silences because filling them too soon, much less preemptively, prevents the speaker from communicating what they are perhaps struggling to say.

Finish something. Anything.

Finish something. Anything. Stop researching, planning, and preparing to do the work and just do the work. It doesn’t matter how good or how bad it is. You don’t need to set the world on fire on your first try. You just need to prove to yourself that you have what it takes to produce something. There are no artists, athletes, entrepreneurs, or scientists who became great by half-finishing their work. Stop debating what you should make and just make something.

If you’re willing to walk

When you find yourself in an entrenched conflict, ask yourself, “Do you want to be right or do you want to be free?” Choose only one. Also: the first rule of negotiation is that whoever cares more loses. If you’re willing to walk, you’re always in a stronger position.

There is almost always more than one way

There is almost always more than one way to accomplish something. Often the alternative options are easier, quicker, cheaper, or just better.

Know the difference

Know the difference between what you can control and what you can’t. (Hint: most things you can’t.) If you’re able to stop worrying about things you can’t control, this practice can remove plenty of worries!

You’ll never learn to think independently

Think about the political party or group you most identify with, and consider what you disagree with them about. Do the same for any religious affiliation, nationality, organization, and so on. You’ll never learn to think independently if you adopt a platform without scrutinizing it.

Try to remember that everyone has experienced trauma

Try to remember that everyone has experienced trauma and heartache of some kind—or if they’ve been fortunate to avoid it until now, sooner or later it will find them. Keep this in mind when dealing with people you find annoying.

Real winners quit most of the time

Walking away from a bad situation is always an option. If you don’t like something as much as you thought, don’t be afraid to change your mind. Ignore sunk costs! Real winners quit most of the time.

Your biggest challenge is having too many options

Your biggest challenge is having too many options. You will be great at whatever you choose, but you have to choose.

The more an idea is tied to your identity

The more an idea is tied to your identity, the more you will ignore the evidence it is false. To continue to grow and learn, you must be willing to update, expand, and edit your identity.

Forgive yourself

Forgive yourself. Be aware of energy drains. Develop the habit of being curious about your emotions instead of being carried away with them. Make a commitment to letting go of the need to worry.

Ask for help at the top

Very few people dare to ask for help, ideas, or support, let alone ask people higher up the top of ‘the ladder.’ Making bold asks, whether it’s for mentorship, asking for a job or simply to make a connection with someone a little out of your league, may frequently be met with rejection. But that doesn’t mean you won’t occasionally get what you ask for. When you do, you’ll be propelled.

You will have problems no matter what you do

Problem-avoidance and comfort-seeking are for the general masses who are satisfied with a vanilla existence. You will have problems no matter what you do, so find them, seek ways to solve them, and focus on the BIG problems.

Have your sexual needs met

Sex, as fun as it is, and as much as many of us want to deny it — presents a significant drain on our energy, time, and attention. This can be otherwise redirected to the necessary work needed to create and sustain success in other areas.

Yes, have your sexual needs met, but most of us indulge too heavily. Orgasm leads to a dopamine dip for several hours — even days, which lowers motivation. Few remember people for their prolific sexual history. Successful people understand the power of sexual energy and direct most of it to create remarkable things.

Most people make their lives far harder than it needs to be

Most people make their lives far harder than it needs to be by spending considerable chunks of time in their thoughts. This won’t bring the intended benefits. In fact, we make ourselves feel considerably worse through worry. This destroys our focus and the performance needed for taking action and making an impact. Train yourself to recover from setbacks by getting back into motion quickly.

Both romance and friendship often start the same way

One of the more surprising findings in the science of relationships is that both romance and friendship often start the same way — with a spark.

But, what happens next? Often, we place our romantic partners above all else and ask our friends to wait in the wings, say relationship experts. Yet, a growing body of research shows friends are essential to a healthy life — and they are just as important for our well-being as healthy eating habits or a good night’s sleep.